Normal

Normal. It's a familiar word, and is one that gets used often. It seems, however, to be a word based completely on context and personal experience. Sitting here in wool slippers and a vest, looking out at a cloudless blue sky and a frozen lake is normal to someone living in the northern midwest on the first day of February. Not so for someone living in South Florida. Normal is subjective.

When I started practicing yoga, harmoniums, mantras, and deep devotion were part of the experience from day one. As a result these aspects of the practice seem very normal. I have spent much of my yoga life living in a bubble; being part of a community with folks on a similar path, sharing common practices, and speaking the same (heart)language. In some ways, though we didn't live under the same roof, it was a bit like living an ashram life. Same teachers, same satsang, same practice day in and day out. The thing about normal-bubbles is when you step out of them what was normal might now be the opposite.

For the past three-and-a-half years this normal/opposite dichotomy has been my life, approaching my practices and teaching as I have for many years, having them slowly accepted – a student once told me that she enjoyed my classes but often thought some of what was offered was "a little out there", but still being a little too round for a triangular hole. On the other side of that coin, I return to San Francisco every few months to a space I can navigate blindfolded, teachers who have been guide since the 90s, and students with whom I've been sharing yoga for a decade or more in some cases. It shouldn't surprise me that there are times I return home feeling like I'm a bit rounder and the hole a bit more triangular. I've never, in those moments, decided to try to fit in because ultimately I don't really want to be normal, and I believe in this practice. But I have thought that maybe this practice I love so much might always be a little opposite where I am now, and that I might be the guy who shows up to teach asana with the strange little music box, who asks his students to sing the names of God.

Yesterday that scenario began to crumble. After a weekend discussing and sharing the roots and practices of the bhakti marga or the path of devotion with a wonderful group of teachers, we spent our last hours together playing harmonium and singing praises. At the end, half of the group was ready to buy their own harmonium, and to begin incorporating some of these practices into their life. I couldn't be more surprised or more thrilled. And I'm very excited to see what happens next now that there are a few more folks with love bites from the Lord of Love.

mama mana mandire raha nisi-din

krishna murari sri krishna murari

Please abide in the temple of my heart both day and night,

O Krishna Murari, Sri Krishna Murari!

Hari Bol!

Yesterday was sweet beyond words. Spending the day with our twenty-two amazing Courage & Grace Advanced Teacher Trainees, talking all things bhakti, and dissolving together was such a gift. The second stage of the bhakti path is sadhu sangha or association with a holy community. It felt like just that. I'm so grateful for this time, and for this life I've been blessed with. Bowing deeply.

In the Bhakti-rasamrta-sindhu the science of devotional sevice is explained as follows:

In the beginning stage there must be a preliminary desire for self-realization. This will lead one to the platform of desiring to associate with spiritually advanced persons. The next step is to become initiated by an authorized spiritual master and to perform devotional service under his guidance. Through the execution of devotional service under the guidance of the spiritual master, one will become free from all material attachments, achieves steadiness in self realization and finds taste in hearing about Krsna, the Supreme Personality of Godhead. This taste leads one to further attachment in Krsna consciousness which is called bhava or the preliminary stage of pure love of Godhead. Pure love to the Lord is called prema or the supreme perfectional stage in life.

faith

Faith is not a belief. Faith is what is left when your beliefs have all been blown to hell. Faith is in the heart, while beliefs are in the head. Experiences, even spiritual experiences, come and go. As long as you base your faith on experience, your faith is going to be constantly flickering, because your experiences keep changing. The moment you recognize that faith lies behind experience, that it's just being, but the experience of being, then it's just "Ah, so".

~ Ram Dass from Be Love Now

European Satsang

Dance with the circumstances

But keep aware of the dancers

and the of the purpose of the dance.

The relationships you keep have a great effect on you:

you become what you associate yourself with.

So stay only in Holy company,

on travel with those in the same boat.

Nothing is better than Satsang so keep your friends Here.

Associate only with those going in the same direction

and go to Truth at any cost.

A friend is one who does not disturb your mind.

Maintain no friendship with ones who disturb your mind,

no matter how close they are,

be it a person, a place, or idea.

Do not accept the invitations of foolish persons

because when you live in their society

Truth will not kiss you. ~Sri H.W.L. Poonja

I'm packing today. Off to Germany and Spain for the next few weeks. It's the European Teaching Tour, Summer 2014 edition. I'm looking forward to seeing those I know and those I haven't yet met but are meant to.

Things get started on Thursday in Berlin where I'll be teaching the daily yoga classes, and making music for the 11-day Thai Massage Course for Beginners taking place at the Osho Mauz Zentrum. I also get to be the student during this time. I'll be exploring new ways to assist and heal, and I'll come home with a few new skills to share with my community here.

From there, to the Couch in Köln, the Conference in Barcelona and my shanti in Nürnberg. All the specifics are on reUnionyoga.com. I'm sure I'll have reflections along the way.

RAM

RAM

RAM

Akarna dhanurasana 2

Taking aim at the Tenney Lock. Just another Saturday afternoon.

Rest in Peace great sage

This is one of my favorites from Maya Angelou. She left us many, many more. Rest is peace.

A Brave and Startling Truth

We, this people, on a small and lonely planet
Traveling through casual space
Past aloof stars, across the way of indifferent suns
To a destination where all signs tell us
It is possible and imperative that we learn
A brave and startling truth

And when we come to it
To the day of peacemaking
When we release our fingers
From fists of hostility
And allow the pure air to cool our palms

When we come to it
When the curtain falls on the minstrel show of hate
And faces sooted with scorn are scrubbed clean
When battlefields and coliseum
No longer rake our unique and particular sons and daughters
Up with the bruised and bloody grass
To lie in identical plots in foreign soil

When the rapacious storming of the churches
The screaming racket in the temples have ceased
When the pennants are waving gaily
When the banners of the world tremble
Stoutly in the good, clean breeze

When we come to it
When we let the rifles fall from our shoulders
And children dress their dolls in flags of truce
When land mines of death have been removed
And the aged can walk into evenings of peace
When religious ritual is not perfumed
By the incense of burning flesh
And childhood dreams are not kicked awake
By nightmares of abuse

When we come to it
Then we will confess that not the Pyramids
With their stones set in mysterious perfection
Nor the Gardens of Babylon
Hanging as eternal beauty
In our collective memory
Not the Grand Canyon
Kindled into delicious color
By Western sunsets

Nor the Danube, flowing its blue soul into Europe
Not the sacred peak of Mount Fuji
Stretching to the Rising Sun
Neither Father Amazon nor Mother Mississippi who, without favor,
Nurture all creatures in the depths and on the shores
These are not the only wonders of the world

When we come to it
We, this people, on this minuscule and kithless globe
Who reach daily for the bomb, the blade and the dagger
Yet who petition in the dark for tokens of peace
We, this people on this mote of matter
In whose mouths abide cankerous words
Which challenge our very existence
Yet out of those same mouths
Come songs of such exquisite sweetness
That the heart falters in its labor
And the body is quieted into awe

We, this people, on this small and drifting planet
Whose hands can strike with such abandon
That in a twinkling, life is sapped from the living
Yet those same hands can touch with such healing, irresistible tenderness
That the haughty neck is happy to bow
And the proud back is glad to bend
Out of such chaos, of such contradiction
We learn that we are neither devils nor divines

When we come to it
We, this people, on this wayward, floating body
Created on this earth, of this earth
Have the power to fashion for this earth
A climate where every man and every woman
Can live freely without sanctimonious piety
Without crippling fear

When we come to it
We must confess that we are the possible
We are the miraculous, the true wonder of this world
That is when, and only when
We come to it. 

whoopsie daisy

Usually I limp into my Friday, grateful that my long week is over, and I generally don't practice on Fridays. Maybe that's where I went wrong.

 

The howling winds woke me up earlier than planned so I showered and decided to spend some time on my mat. Nice and simple. Some pranayama, squatting, vajrasana, virasana, padmasana, and meditation. The perfect little TGIF practice. Feeling great, I got dressed and headed downstairs to feed the pets and walk the dog. Halfway down I lost my footing, and was suddenly sliding down, trying catch myself with a growing pain running up my left side. When I came to a stop at the foot of stairs all I could do is groan and try to collect myself while assessing my situation. Once I was on my feet, I realized that nothing was broken - obviously - and that at most would only be a bit sore and perhaps a little black-and-blue.

The lesson? Well there's more than one. First: wool socks on a wooden staircase means ALWAYS use the handrail. Always. But the main take-away is that a healthy body is my friend in moments like these. Moving my body dynamically, strengthening my muscles efficiently, and cultivating better circulation regularly, on the one hand means that I occasionally have some muscle soreness. But because I balance out everything I with regular breaks and days off, the bounce-back doesn't take long. A balanced yoga practice really does prepare you for anything and everything that life can throw at you. Sitting here on my couch alternating between cold and heat I can feel where my leg is going to be little tender for a day or so but I'm okay with that. I didn't end up in the ER. I'm reminded to trust my instincts and to trust my routines. Today was supposed to be a day of rest after a couple days of intense practice, exploring some deep shapes. In the end, it has been. I get it. Tell the Universe I'm listening.

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the search

There was a child made of all salt who very much wanted to know where he had come from. So he set out on a long journey and traveled to many lands in pursuit of this understanding. Finally he came to the shore of the great ocean. How marvelous, he cried, and stuck on foot in the water. The ocean beckoned him in further saying, "If you wish to know who you are, do not be afraid." The salt child walked further and further into the water dissolving with each step, and at the end exclaimed, "Ah, now I know who I am."

~Traditional~

Giving Thanks

Happy Thanksgiving!

i thank You God for most this amazing

day; for the leaping greenly spirits of trees

and a blue true dream of sky; and for everything

which is natural which is infinite which is yes. 

~ e.e. cummings

Reason to celebrate : Sita and Rama return!

Happy Diwali!

Light the lamps and celebrate!

Shubh Dewali!

Diwali celebrates the return of Rama and Sita - in the story from the Ramayana. The story shows how good wins over evil.

Prince Rama and his wife, Sita, are banished from their home in Ayodhya by their father the King. Rama's brother, Lakshmana, goes with them to live in a forest. They are banished for fourteen years.

After many happy years, Sita is kidnapped by the ten-headed demon Ravana. He takes Sita to his island of Lanka. With the help of the monkey warrior, Hanuman, Rama rescues his wife.

The people of Ayodhya light divas (oil lamps) in rows to guide Rama and Sita back from the forest to Ayodhya. On their return Rama is crowned king.

from Juliet Dunn

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Change is gonna come

Life is full of changes. Life is change! When we stop changing we stop living because change is forward movement, and we humans are moving beings; we're born to move and change. Evolution and involution are change. Sometimes change comes from the inside, as a by-product of our sadhana or spiritual work. Other times change comes from the outside, causing us to address our habits, asks us to step out of our comfort zone, and offers a new opportunity to practice. Change is new and is ultimately positive. Change is not always easy, and is sometimes painful, even destructive. The yoga sutra of Patanjali teaches us to expect some pain when it says, 'parinama tapa samskara duhkhair guna vritti virodhac ca duhkham eva sarvam vivekinah' – To one of discrimination, everything is painful indeed due to its consequences: the anxiety and fear over what is gained: the resulting impressions left in the mind to renewed cravings; and the constant conflict among the three gunas which control the mind. (translation by Sri Swami Satchidananda Yoga Sutra of Patanjali) Some pain is expected in all worldly experience by anyone who is awake. Fighting the natural progression of life, of change, only creates more suffering.

Change can be practiced. More than one of my teachers has said, "We don't come to yoga to stay the same, we practice yoga to change." Routine in asana practice is important because repetition helps to rewire the body, the mind, and the nervous system. When routine becomes mechanical we plateau in our practice; we stagnate. This is why it's important to move in familiar ways without always moving in the exact ways we've moved before. In asana practice if there are equal parts routine and new, we stay awake in our practice; we ride the waves of change deeper and deeper to our deeper selves. In the same way when routine in our life loses its forward flow, we need change; we call out, sometimes without even realizing, for change. As practice deepens and we begin to connect more with the source within, our thoughts and words are more charged and have power. In these moments of deep connection our thoughts, even unconscious thoughts find life. Change! Of course, when change presents itself we still have to decide if we really want it. Do we really want to step through the door? This reminds me of a passage from Everyday Osho:

Always remain adventurous. Never forget for a single moment that life belongs to those who are explorers. It does not belong to the static; it belongs to the flowing. Never become a reservoir; always remain a river. 

The mind cannot cope with the new. It cannot figure out what it is, it cannot categorize it, it cannot put labels on it; it is puzzled by the new. The mind loses all its efficiency when it confronts something new.  With the past, with the old, with the familiar, the mind is very at ease, because it knows what it is, how to do, what to do, what not to do. It is perfect in the known; it is moving in well-traveled territory. Even in darkness it can move; the familiarity helps the mind to be unafraid. But this is one of the problems to be understood: Because the mind is always unafraid only with the familiar, it does not allow you growth. Growth is with the new, and the mind is only unafraid of the old. So the mind clings to the old and avoids the new. The old seems to be synonymous with life, and the new seems to be synonymous with death; that is the mind's way of looking at things. You have to put the mind aside.

Life never remains static. Everything is changing: Today it is there, tomorrow it may not be. You may come across it again; who knows when? Maybe it will take months, years, or lives. So when an opportunity knocks at the door, go with it. Let this be a fundamental law: Always choose the new over the old. 

Right now, everything is changing and I'm embracing it. A door has opened and I'm stepping through because on some level I know I've been asking for something new. But stepping into the new doesn't mean forgetting the old. Moving forward doesn't mean never looking back. The old is where our roots live. The old is where we were formed. The old is to be revered as much as the new. One day the new will be the old and there will be a new new. That's the nature of change. Move forward. Don't forget. Move forward. Don't forget. Move forward. Don't forget. The sankofa bird symbolizes this in the way he leads with his heart but turns his head to retrieve an egg from his back. The West African proverb that gives birth to this symbol is “Se wo were fi na wosankofa a yenkyi," which translates to "It is not wrong to go back for that which you have forgotten." Stepping through this particular door for me means leaving. Embracing this change means starting a new life in a new city. Moving forward means leaving the Bay Area. In August my little family and I will take up new residence in a little house in Madison, WI where Johannes will be the new Director of Jazz Studies at University of Wisconsin-Madison. It will be what Ruth Forman calls, "a day of painful breaking/a day of peace beneath" because we are excited to embark on our next adventure, but saying good-bye is never easy. Moving to Madison puts me closer to childhood turf of Chicago, and in some ways feels like going home. The new is the old.

Over the next couple of weeks I will scale back my classes a little to help facilitate a smooth and graceful transition at the Lotus. The time between now and then will go quickly, and the days leading up to my departure will be hectic. In these quiet moments before the real shift begins I would like to take a moment to bow and say thank you. Thank you to my teachers Jasmine and Danafor believing in me, supporting me as a teacher, for guiding me and for helping to mold me into the teacher I am. Being on this journey with you as examples has been a gift that I will treasure with respect for ever. Thanks to the Lotus, both Lotues. Being a part of this very special place for the last twelve years (nine as a teacher) has been truly transforming. Thank you to my fellow Lotus teachers for being you, for being inspiring, for stepping in and for rising up to support Laughing Lotus San Francisco. Thank you to all of you who have been willing to accept the teachings I have had to offer. I am constantly humbled that you continue to allow me to share with you what I love. Thank you to Oakland! You have been my home for these last five years. I love all your color, style, diversity, sunshine, and your issues. *snap* Thanks for keeping it real.

I'm not sure how life in this next chapter is going to look. Madison is wonderful city with a lot of good to offer. Johannes and I have already been welcomed with huge, open arms, and it feels like a place we'll be happy to call home. I'll be out in the world not quite on my own for the first time in my teaching career, and I don't know how that will feel. I hope to find a place or a couple of places to share these practices that I love. It's what I do. I will be on the road – Santa Fe and Joshua Tree in the Fall, Germany in the Spring and Portugal in the Summer. Look for me. I'll be releasing Soul Sangha's first album in the Fall too. Stay tuned for more info on that. I plan to begin working on my prerequisite classes in preparation for a degree in Physical Therapy. It feels like the natural next step for me. Mainly I'm open for whatever life and this change want to throw my way.  Like the sankofa, I know that the egg on my back is always in reach. I'll try not to forget anything I've learned here, but when I do I'll pick up that egg and hold it close. I'll remember. One thing with change is certain: it ain't easy but you gotta do it.

Monday passage

Here's this morning's meditation passage, as requested. Sit, and discover your freedom.

Let nothing upset you;

Let nothing frighten you.

Everything is changing;

God alone is changeless.

Patience attains the goal.

Who has God lacks nothing;

God alone fills every need.

~Teresa of Avila

from Passage Meditation by Eknath Easwaran

Sharing the Love in Santa Fe

I'm thrilled to be sharing my passion for music, movement and devotion with Body of Santa Fe. 

Stop by or tell someone who can.

Ram Ram Ram

It's kirtan night. Join us tonight at Giggling Lotus at 8 PM. Let's chant the night away!

Happy Easter!

On this holiday, the cornerstone of the Christian faith, and during this week of Passover - both being celebrations of freedom and new beginnings - it is always good to remember we're not so different from each other. Religions, faiths, Gods/Goddesses my have different names, but the seeking and the sought after are the same; love, light, wholeness and spiritual freedom are not exclusive to any belief system. With that, here's the passage from Life of Pi to which I referred to this morning in my Easter class.

image by collective dogs

I know a woman here in Toronto who is very dear to my heart. She was my foster mother. I call her Auntieji and she likes that. She is Québécoise. Those she has lived in Toronto for over thirty years, her French-speaking mind still slips on occasion on the the understanding of English sounds. And so, when she first heard of Hare Krishnas, she didn't hear right. She heard "Hairless Christians", and that is what they were to her for many years. When I corrected her, I told her that in fact she was not so wrong; that Hindus, in their capacity for love, were indeed hairless Christians, just as Muslims, in the way they see God in everything, are bearded Hindus, and Christians, in their devotion to God, are hat-wearing Muslims.

Hey Krishna!

I'm working on the tracks and arrangements for the Soul Sangha's album (to be recorded this summer), and I've decided this one is a definite!

He Krishna (Sri Krishna Pranama)

he krishna karuna-sindho
dina bandho jagat pate
gopesha gopika-kanta
radha-kanta namo 'stu te

O my dear Krishna, You are the friend of the distressed and the source of creation.
You are the master of the gopis and the lover of Radharani. I offer my respectful
obeisances unto You.

Here's a clip of this mantra from our kirtan last month in New York.

What does it mean to practice yoga?

I usually prefer not to get involved in the yoga wars, either praising the latest article celebrating the practice or decrying the ones which cast the practice in a less-than-flattering light. My opinion is as valid as anyone's but, yoga is understood through direct experience only and nothing I say or write on the subject can change what someone has already experienced or the opinions formed by that. There have been many responses to William J. Broad's NY Times How Yoga Can Wreck Your Body from January 5, 2012 but I think this offering is pretty spot on: Yoga Can’t Hurt You: If You Can Find It. ~ Godfrey Devereux. Enjoy.

cult of personality

When Yoga Journal published it's 35th Anniversary issue in 2010, the online gallery of covers provided a unique view of modern, popular yoga in America dating back to 1975. It was cool to see those early issues with their varied and sometimes esoteric articles, but I was struck by a marked change in YJ's look and approach in 1999 when the new normal for their cover art became photos of pretty people in striking asanas (February), and when the subhead of "For Health and Conscious Living" began to disappear (November). I'm not here to critique Yoga Journal or publishing. However I'm troubled by this shift, primarily because I think yoga's benefits are for all people, and this prettying up and cookie-cuttering acts as a barrier (unintentionally so, I'm sure) to someone who may not fit into this published ideal. But more than this, I fear this is one of the things leading to the birth of the yoga superstar, and the beginning of an industry that has fame and money as its driving forces.

in and out: getting closer to kapotasana

I've had another aha! on my journey to kapotasana (see my summer poses and unexpected detour)! Vinyasa is loosely translated as flow. Though there is a fluidity inherent in the vinyasa practice, the term vinyasa comes from nyasa meaning to place, and vi meaning in a special way. Vinyasa is the conscious, progressive placement of asana that supports a healthy opening of the physical body. Simpler movements and shapes will naturally produce more advanced poses.

challenge

Your feet can make a huge difference is your asanas, and a little expression in and awareness of your toes can change everything. This caught my eye. It seems simple until you try it. You might want to turn down the sound first...